Rewriting the Code: How Psychodynamic Therapy Helps Us Understand Our Early Programming
We often move through life following patterns we don’t fully understand. Reactions that feel automatic. Emotions that seem too big or too distant. Relationships that repeat themselves in familiar, frustrating ways. Psychodynamic therapy offers a way of understanding these patterns by looking beneath the surface — not to pathologise, but to understand where they began.
An analogy I sometimes offer clients is that of a computer program. We all run on "source code" written early in life. But unlike a software developer writing code with clear logic, our early psychological programming comes from experiences: our caregivers, culture, family dynamics, attachment, and environment. We don’t choose this programming, but we live by it.
The Code Is Written Early
In those early years, we begin to form an unconscious blueprint of how the world works, how we should behave, and what we can expect from others. This blueprint helps us survive emotionally, but it can become outdated as we grow. What once helped us cope may now limit us.
Some of that early "code" comes from love and attunement. But some may come from neglect, shame, chaos, or inconsistency. Just like a bug in a program can cause crashes or glitches, unresolved early experiences can show up in adult life as anxiety, self-doubt, emotional numbness, or conflict.
Therapy as Debugging
Psychodynamic therapy is a space to slow down and examine what’s really going on under the hood. We look at the recurring patterns, emotional responses, and unconscious expectations you carry. Together, we explore where those patterns may have come from — and whether they still serve you.
This isn’t about blaming the past. It’s about understanding the logic of your inner world, so that what once felt confusing starts to make sense. And once it makes sense, something new becomes possible.
Rewriting the Code
Insight creates choice. When we become aware of our early programming, we don’t have to be ruled by it anymore. We can begin to rewire old expectations, loosen defensive patterns, and relate to ourselves and others with more freedom.
Psychodynamic therapy helps you do this slowly, with care. It isn’t a quick fix — but it goes deep. And over time, the inner shifts become real, lasting ones.
Working Together
I work with adults who are curious about their inner world and tired of repeating the same patterns. My approach is grounded in psychodynamic thinking, and I welcome clients who want to explore not just what they feel, but why.
If this way of working resonates with you, you’re welcome to get in touch for an initial conversation.
References
Cicchetti, D. and Toth, S.L., 2005. Child maltreatment. Annual Review of Clinical Psychology, 1, pp.409-438.
Fonagy, P. and Target, M., 2003. Psychoanalytic theories: Perspectives from developmental psychopathology. The Psychoanalytic Quarterly, 72(1), pp.183-189.
Gabbard, G.O., 2004. Long-term psychodynamic psychotherapy: A basic text. Arlington, VA: American Psychiatric Publishing, Inc.
Shedler, J., 2010. The efficacy of psychodynamic psychotherapy. American Psychologist, 65(2), pp.98-109.
Sroufe, L.A., Egeland, B., Carlson, E.A. and Collins, W.A., 2005. The development of the person: The Minnesota study of risk and adaptation from birth to adulthood. New York: Guilford Press.
Westen, D., 1998. The scientific legacy of Sigmund Freud: Toward a psychodynamically informed psychological science. Psychological Bulletin, 124(3), pp.333-371.